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Sunday, April 15, 2012

The job, me, and the lessons!




Something about my job has started scaring me about late nights! On numerous occasions when I have had the audacity to stay awake till wee hours because I had to go to work late the next day, I have been called to resume work in the early morning. Part and parcel of being a reporter! Something I may complain occasionally, but accept otherwise. Of course also goes without saying, I am getting no wiser with late nights.


A couple of days back I decided to stay awake till almost my usual waking hours. And just as I was in an hour of sleep I was called on duty. Mr Bachchan had taken unwell. He tweeted so. Needless to say, he being one of the most loved people in the country, his illness was of importance to a news channel. So I was there, outside his house, standing… waiting for any update so that I could relay it to my channel at the earliest. With me there were some others too, from rival channels. Some cribbed, some abused their lucks…


After hours of standing in the heat I reached office where usual work followed. The day’s initial excitement had died down and soon the sun was down too. Leaving work I and my colleague Rashma made our way to the nearby departmental story to buy some eatables for the way before getting an auto. Usually a boring store where the owner seldom watches anything but bhajans on his TV, on this day the place turned out to be quite interesting. And this was so because of a girl. [Now, how girls can turn almost anything interesting deserves a thesis. Will try that later] Not the prettiest of them all, but one with some views which caught my attention outright.


Busy chatting with a colleague of hers, she was telling about this match that her parents had found for her. “He is an entertainment reporter. One of those fools who stand outside Amitabh Bachchan’s house one his birthday. I mean why would I ever be interested in such a loser…”  Ouch! Did she just say that? Oh yes she did. My colleague heard it too. The girl went on to talk about how she believed this guy is no more than a dimwit. Well, I am a proud person. I don’t take such criticism well. I may not be the match that her parents found; hence there was no need for me to get as personal. But I too am one of those who stand outside Mr Bachchan’s house on occasions. Or for that matter any other star’s houses… or airports… or wherever. But that’s my job! She had no business judging my or any of my reporter friend’s IQ on basis of only fraction of the work we do.

So what?

Oh, how I wanted to walk up to her and ask her some questions! Some questions that would make her pride go bust with realisation of her own IQ. I would have probably done that had I been alone. Only if Rashma had not held me back… But then Rashma probably did hold me back for a good reason. Probably, the girl was not worth the trouble of me fixing her mind! Probably!

As I walked out, I had a certain sense of pride. Not only because I restrained from spoiling that girl’s and my evening with a worthless conversation; but also because I am entertainment correspondent who has a better understanding of things that people like her whose minds are as small as the cubicles they work in... No generalisations, let me add, before you poke that finger at me!


Cribbing about job ain’t new. It’s probably is one of the most universal phenomena. Almost everyone does it, in their own way and space… or at special occasions. Would not hence say that reporting sees more of it; but it certainly does a fair amount. It’s acceptable; no one likes to stand outside a star’s house for updates of his life. But then each job has its pluses and minuses. We have our magnificent pluses too. We help change things and mindsets while we inform.

I will be standing outside Mr Bachchan’s house again, and I will hear some fellow reporters crib and some abuse their lucks… I thankfully have learnt better. 
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Saturday, April 07, 2012

Heart break


I still reel



For what I feel

To God I kneel

Hoping to heal

Emotions never peel

No matter what zeal

A break so shrill

Leaves me sans thrill

Life just kill

No more this drill!





Of course I never doubted the outrageousness I could reach as a poet. But then, I do feel the need to remind the world every now and then… that expecting me to be any saner would be insanity. Great expectations break heart… and so many other things!

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Sunday, December 25, 2011

The 'First Love' syndrome!


A friend of mine is in love. His first love! And he is in pain. Rough patches… I personally see no future in his story. But for him, this is it. He says, “Pyaar ek hi baar hota hai.. sacha pyaar”. I can’t help smiling. I know where he is coming from… I just tell him, “Happens… you will know better in good time!” He gives me a look and our conversation is over. Oh, I have been through this too. The 'first love' syndrome!

--

Eight years back… I was just into my second year of graduation, and probably fourth month into my first ‘love’ story! I was busy making plans for my visit home. As a student I travelled by train and that meant I had to book the tickets well in advance to be able to get a ticket. And this time I was planning my winter vacation earlier than the last time. Not around Christmas… but at least 10 days before that.

SURPRISE!
All planned except the ticket, I was sitting by the steps on my college blocks when my senior joined me. As we spoke I happened to share with him how I am looking forward to being in Guwahati by December 15. When I told him I wanted to surprise ‘her’ as it was her birthday he could not stop smiling. After grinning ear to ear for sometime he finally asked me, “Is this your first love?” I replied in positive. He patted my back and said, “I understand. We have all been through that. Don’t worry, you will know better in some years, or let’s say some relationships later.” I shrugged off. Back then ‘she’ was the one, no one else would replace her. And this was to be the lifelong relationship. Quite filmy I suppose… but what do you expect from a Bollywood buff! The senior walked away with an ‘I know all about this’ smile, leaving me more resolute that I am going to make that relationship sustain for my life. And that should not have been tough…

Two months from then as the date of journey came closer my parents desperately tried to cancel my visit. Reason: Assamese-Bihari clashes were at heights and any train passing through Bihar was not safe. Things had gone bad when a Naga girl was raped in a Delhi bound train by some Bihari youth who were retaliating to some of their friends being assaulted in Guwahati when these guys went to appear for railway exams. And now some rogues in Bihar were attacking just about every Assam-bound train. I was least concerned. I was certain that I had to reach Guwahati by the birthday. And I was willing to risk an attack… mar bhi jaaye pyaarwaale, mit bhi jaaye yaarwale, zinda rehti hai unki mohabbatein! With the lean frame of my body back then (or trust me… I used to be lean too) I was all set to fight goons, if required, to reach my destination.


No such drama happened. The train had to pass through just two stations in Bihar and that was quick. I was safe and I reached my city. Only know that my heart was to be crushed… on the BIG day! ‘She’ had suddenly realized it was all an infatuation and would not want to meet me, leave alone wear that bracelet that I had managed to buy for her. (Well frankly… it was my elder sister who paid for it!).

There I was… left alone. The world fell on me. Heart crushed…no sounds, just tears all night long, for almost a month. Sigh! I was still hopeful that she would come back.

Fact 1 - She did not return. Rather she fell for someone else.
Fact2 – Oh! I fell for someone too. And soon someone else again… and again!

Eight years from then, as I look back… I do not grieve the fact that my first love story did not turn my only. But I do celebrate the fact that I had my share of love stories… If you ask me, each break up was responsible for the growth in me as a person.  And while some really believe that I am bordering on to insanity, I believe today I know what I need better, than I did eight years back.

--

The few days back it was the birthday of my first girlfriend and that also happens to be my ‘first break-up’ day.  There are rarely better days that could portray the change in me as a person over the years.  Reactions to that message were hilarious but they only made me believe one thing… Change, sometimes, is beyond comprehension. In such cases, Love is usually the catalyst!


Here’s the message:
“Once I was willing to risk my life to do something special on this particular day. Today I wonder if it is just the date that changed or is it me! May be both... Probably I was good back then, evidently I am perfect now!


As this year ends and another year is set to start, open your heart and let love flow in. You need not hold on to anything… just love everything that you get to experience. May the New Year bring in new loves! 
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Friday, August 19, 2011

The clichés of my day



I wish I had those mornings again  
Waking up to your voice
The sweet nothings
Before rushing to the noise

I wish I had those afternoons again
Breaking the clutter with your call
Asking how the day goes…
Including every detail… big or small!

I wish I had those evenings again
Walk by beach  
Hair catching the breeze
Talking what did the day teach!

I don’t wish however for the nights again
Because darkness it got into lives
Because departure it does remind...
When I lost you and my mind…



--
Well, That's as bad as romance and poetry can get. You could find better romance in certain books... books of love letters...

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Tuesday, August 02, 2011

Stale mate!


Irritate, stalemate!
I had a date
Jiska kharab tha pet
And she was late
Upar Jyada tha menu ka rate
Aisa tha evening fate
Samjho mera state
Ho gaya main irritate…
And frustrate
No more of this shit mate!
Mujhe chahiye someone great!
Till then.. stalemate, stalemate!


----
Well that was... the worst rap ever. From yours truly. 
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Friday, July 29, 2011

Boondein...


Aaj apni haal kuch azeeb si hai   
Paani aankhon se aaye
Bheege joote bhi hai..


Bachke to aa gaye hum
Baarish ke baar se…
Kare kya lekin hum
Is toofan ka jo dil mein hai...





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Saturday, July 23, 2011

Mirage


love...

So I walked
Trudged rather, tired that I was
Towards the mirage that you created
Self said no, heart said go
And so I walked…


I travelled through days, weeks and months
Wounded feet and bruised heart
Faintly hoping the mirage would be you
Largely knowing it was just myth and hue
And so I walked…


I give in I give up
Destiny pulls me down, heart pull me up
Tattered to extreme, it still hopes
That mirage would be you and not just hues
And so I walk…





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